2 Knowing the past

I thought I could handle five more months of this but turns out I can't. I tried, I really did. I tried too hard for it to be my fault. Do you know how many times you said you loved me in my entire life? Two. Two fucking times. You are the only person who should love me. You are the only one who I expected to be there for me and to love me but you can't do that. Do you hate me that much? It's not my fault. You know it's not my fault, and even not being my fault I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry, just please don't hate me. I don't love you anymore, and I'm starting to deslike you. Please don't make me hate you, but you have to change fast. He did it. Yes, he did. And I hate you for supporting him. I came in first, I'm yours no matter what. How do you love a stranger more than me? He did it and you said I was wrong. Tell me then what I did because I'm sorry. I'm sorry no matter what I did, but please don't go killing me slowly and coldly. Don't do that to me. I hate people I should love, and love people I should hate. I guess there's something wrong with me.